The Dickler

Madeleine McCann

2007-05-15T23:10:00.000+01:00

Take a good look at these (Courtesy of the Sunday Independent site) if you haven't already seen them, click on the link above.
This is the girl that everyone is looking for.
These photos should be on every lamppost, in every town, just like all the other "Stolen Children".

This is not the parents fault, There but for the grace of god.....

May god protect her, and Damn those responsible whatever they are, Human they ain't, when caught they shouldn't get humane treatment.

My Online Shrine.

2007-04-03T22:45:00.000+01:00

Now, What in the faysajaysus is the Dickler up to now, you might ask?

Let me explain meself.

A few of us skobes decided that on our tour to Swansea fer de Llanelli Vs. Munster game that we might as well tek in de auld game of footies between Caerdydd and The New Team of Keano.

Bock is far more eloquent here in his description of the epic journey!

Anywise After being told by this Kind Lady (Who stood in my line of vision awhile I was trying to get a shot of De "KEANO") that My camera was "A professional" (okay tis a big fucker of a lens that does need a monopod at its glorious 500mm length of the zoom because of the shake in my auld paw, but the camera was somehow okay with a smaller lens on it???). I was then royally informed that if I dared to put the big lens on again that they would kindly hold the camera for me until the end of the game.

NOT FUCKING LIKELY MY DEAR!! It has travelled the world with me to many a game of all kinds and has never had such a big head as it had for the rest of the day, It's saying things like "Fuck off, I'm a professional now..." ever since, any-time that it doesn't like the look of what it's going to take.

I managed to take two shots of the Cardiff Queen before we finally walked out of the stadium disgusted at the rain, the cold and just general pissed offness at the world due to the previous evenings mass murder. Pakeen told me afterwards that he saw her coming, but he was behind me and thought that she was coming after him because he had the temerity to raise up a Munster flag behind my back, Maybe I'll never know.......

Anyway, HERE'S TO YOU LUV.....

Your self importance deserves to be appreciated and this is my humble attempt.

After the intensity of the night before we were bored silly at the game which didn't help my mood much. It was fun for about ten minutes to see the hardness of some of the tackles and to see "KEANO" bully the referee into not carding a Sunderland player who quite deftly upended a Cardiff player (Followed by ten minutes of "KEEEENOOOOOOO" chanting from the penned in Sunderland supporters in the corner).

To a man as Bock said in his post, we swore NEVER AGAIN.

I'll just show you the other reason why.......

Versus

P.S. Four days later and the Eos is now mumbling things like "work to rule" and "minimum wage" "But I'm an artist" and other such nonsense. Honest to god, I'll hafta bring in the ganger, or else make it an offer it can't refuse, You know I'm in construction and Waste removal , Don't you.......

The Durty Pervs...

2007-03-20T22:33:00.000Z

I made an executive decision and deleted their filth from the comments page of the original post.
This meant of course that I had to moderate comments as well as I'm bound to be on the receiving end of truckloads of crap from these sick monsters.

Thanks to those who left supporting messages, tough shit to those who tried to spread the sickness.

Padraig Nally

2006-12-13T22:43:00.000Z

Just reading a post about the Padraig Nally case going on at the moment in Dublin on my good friend "Bocks" blog
HERE.

The case seems to hinge on the fact that he had only a single barrel shotgun, and after shooting His would be assailant he went into the house to reload the gun and shot John "Frog" Ward a second time fatally.

My thoughts are as simple as this, you do what you have to do in order to protect you and your own. If anyone came near me or mine I'd likely do the same.

If Padraig Nally had this he wouldn't be in jail at the moment.

Automatic Shotgun - video powered by Metacafe

Modern soldiers...

2006-09-04T00:03:00.000+01:00

It's amazing what you can achieve when someone puts a loaded weapon into your hand.
This weekend I saw firsthand the difference between the youth of today and those of us with a more "aged" or mature disposition that had grown up in a much tougher regime.

First squad with me, Mad Mick was the pilot, "Bilbo" so called because of his height, Sham 2, younger, stronger but not as fit as The Sham (Squad 2), Rambo junior, a spit of the big fellah hisself complete with long flowing curly locks and bulging biceps, and myself. As usual we had arranged for accommodation in a local hostelry to maintain cover and arrived with about an hour to go before the assault was to begin. Second squad had made slightly better time , Tom (known as the Ram), The Sham (the eldest of the squad, a body building fitness freak), Davy (Slim guy, chemistry expert, didnt talk much), Aido (usually quiet but a tough nut to crack and soccer mad). The straggler, Liam, that we thought couldn't make it on time was already in position and had organised a quick meal before the transportation arrived.

What arrived to take us to the assault location was an ancient bus (or the remains of one) which rattled its way to the base camp reminiscent of something from a bad fifties B movie, shocks didn't exist and by the time we got there the nerves were strained from the constan ratlling and shaking our bodies had endured during this final stage of travelling to war.

After a final ration break (this could be the last meal for some of us and was approached with the gusto of men in line for the electric chair) we were finally kitted up and after a very brief introduction to the new prototype gun, we were kicked out into the staging area. There we met the other groups who had come together for these final major assaults. Four groups of ten came together and we were split into two forces. our two five man squads split up between the two, we were not used, however, to moving in such large groups as we now were part of. The other groups comprised greener younger men, we were by far the most seasoned group of warriors of the lot, many of us veterans of previous campaigns. We didn't like the feel of this. Bilbo had been left pale and slightly deaf, still hearing echoes of the corrugated steel which had been shot three times in quick succession approximately four feet from his head during the demonstration. He leaned over and whispered to me "jaysus, I'll never make it through this one". He had been separated into the other group from ours. "Christ man", I replied, "just use the young fellahs as cannon fodder, kick em out in front and you'll be fine", I could see that he couldn't hear me, he was lost in another world and he walked away to his men looking wan and pale.

For the first assault we were staging from a fortress type location, our primary objective was to take the village to the north west that we knew was the frontal base for the enemy. East of the village (our North-East)was the remains of a church (secondary objective) that we should take first to form a staging area for the main assault on the village. It had to be taken to allow firing solutions to provide cover for our flanking assault squads. At the very least it would prevent it's use as a sniper hole as it allowed an elevated aerial view of the complete area. Our supply train was directly to our east within easy reach, yet far enough from the action to allow munitions storage and a safe medevac area. After a few minutes to get our bearings the notice to attack came through and we were off. We split our force into four five man squads one stayed behind to take care of munitioons and to prevent a flanking rear attack, one was to try to flank the village moving westerly then north and finally to attack the village from the west. Our squad (We five remaining veterans stayed together) and another five man squad formed of the much younger warriors made our way north to the church.

It was quiet, too quiet. We hadn't met much in the line of resistance, one of the younger guys had to return to the base for medical attention, he hadn't learned to stay in cover and a stray bullet from very long range meant he had to return to base before he could come back to us to help with the main assault. We shimmied our way from tree to tree, pallet to pallet, barrell to barrel, quietly crawling through the undergrowth. We had the church in our sights but there wasn't any fire coming from that area. Finally we passed word to the remaining four of the young fellahs in the second squad to make their way forward attacking from the south but to wait for a signal from us. We'd come from the eastern flank and lay down a covering solution from the east to allow them to move up. When they got into place we would attack from both flanks and split their firepower. It was a simple but effective plan so we thought, they were usually the best. all went as planned, we had made our way up the east side, had laid down covering fire to allow the young fellahs to come up from the south. They covered the distances in a much quicker time, barely giving us time to pause for breath before we had to show ourselves as they gave the signal that they were in place and to start the assault. We attacked from the east, making almost three quarters of the way before a withering hail of bullets came at us from the direction of the church grounds. we were cut down like weeds, no drawing fire from our mates to the south, the fuckers lay in the long grass like lilylivered chickens and left us to die in the assault.

As it turned out three of the five of us received minor injuries during the church attack and were able to come in after some quick medical intervention to help mop up the last of the stragglers left after myself and mick had finally breached the building. We made our way out of earshot of the yungsters who came in after the shooting had died down and all decided that we could not depnd on them. We got notice from the main command that the assault on the village had been unsuccessful. The squads who had made their way there had been ambushed, being the green youngsters that they were and a new objective was in place instead. The enemy's command base had been relocated deeper into the forest and this was to be the location for a final all out assault. we were to join the other half of our team and attack this base. When we took the base we had to hold it until reinforcements arrived. After a quick smoke we broke out the last of the field rations and took what rest we could before the call came to move out. We reloaded and grabbed what spare ammo we could carry and after a quick mapping session with the field commander stealthily inched our way forward until we had the enemy base in sight. Our other group of veterans had split off at this stage and could not be seen in the murky light whcih was all that came through the foliage over head. Suddenly up ahead we heard a warning shot and all hell broke loose. We dived for cover but ahead of us the youngsters had scrambled behind any available tree that they could and stood there frozen like rabbits in front of headlights. We screamed at them to move forward, that they would get us all killed if they stayed in the cover of the trees but they refused to budge. Finally one of them got the balls to make a burst across a ditch but fell into the mud, his weapon lying broken four feet away from him and he refused to lift his head. He just lay there for a minute before the bilbo screamed " he's no fucking good to us, I'll fucking finish him" before pumping him in the head twice and sending him to heaven. This finally galvanised the youngsters into action and with a blood curdling scream, I saw Liam racing ahead of me on my left leading the yungsters in a charge before being cut down my what seemed like a hundred shots to the torso which exploded in a multitude of what looked like red paint to me throughmy sweat sodden eyes. Finally three of our veteran squad broke into the camp while I was busy taking out a very familiar looking sniper hidden high up in the trees. Now all we had to do was hold it.

A quick smoke break was all we had time for, we heard a whistle and then what seemed like an avalanche of the dregs of hell poured at us from the murk of the trees. What remained of our squad had found the best tree cover we could and would act as snipers covering as far as we could up the forest while the yungsters would stay in the base and defend, they were to replace us if we fell. Wave upon wave of attcks came The fog of war descended, you couldn't tell friend from foe, but out of the murk came our former comrades, in a flank attack, they had gone over to the other side. I cut down three of them with a triple taps from my gun before the remaining two dived into cover. Two of my squad had been cut down and I screamed for replacements from the yungsters in the base but to no avail, again the yellow bastards wouldn't budge and myself and Mick had to claw our way backwards picking off any enemy head we could see before making what would be our last stabd in the base. A final wave was coming and the reinforcements were not going to make it through in time. With blood curdling cries they came wave after wave of them, we cut them down and more came, we moved back, I saw mick go down, the back of his head a red gooey mess. My visor fogged up, the clanging of bullets hitting galvanised steel surrounded me, to my left one of the yungsters lay with his head between his knees his hands covering his ears, his broken gun lying at his side. Three of them came in together, The last thing I remember is bullets spraying and blood red spatters creating a red fog all around them, Rambo stood over me screaming "Come on Ye Baaaastards" and all he was missing was a bandolier belt draped over one arm as he sprayed bullets in all directions. That was before it all went dark......

I came to in the back of a tank being driven around by Tom the Ram who had earlier changed sides on us. We were going back to the bus to be driven into town and Tom was at the controls.

As I write this my two legs are stiff and weak, I'm having trouble walking, my back, my head and my legs are covered with blood red circles which are slowly turning black and green, BUT I've survived another stag party, at my age. Christ the paintballing was great but them fucking youngsters were useless, us auld guys had the balls to have a crack, they stayed there and shat themselves.

Tralee got painted red by the ten auld fellahs before retiring to bed at half three in the morning, stiff, sore, but in the knowledge that the young fellahs in the other three stag parties just didn't have the balls that we did........We enjoyed it immensely and we all agree that we'll do it again.

Heres the link

Back to School

2006-08-31T21:44:00.000+01:00

It's that time of year again.

I walked out into the back garden yesterday evening and I got that smell, you know the one, crisp, fresh, hint of colder air coming, to all folk with Munster Blood in em it means one thing and one thing only, Rugby Season!!

I came across the Heineken Cup final ticket today and everything came back in one gutwrenching moment of pure emotion. Here we go again, We've already booked the first of the away game flights, Munster Vs. Leicester (Via Heathrow natch, we couldn't do it the normal way, why break with tradition at this stage FFS.). The usual 4 day trip, Friday to Monday, car hire, Hotel in Birmingham (Don't ask...) I've abandoned the idea of the Local club overnights up North this year, I've made up my mind that I'm going to do as much as I can of the Munster tour this season instead, with a gentle wind down before a two week World Cup trip to France if I can physically make it there.

Roll on this season!!!

Motorcycle Story

2006-08-22T22:11:00.000+01:00

Just a hilarious story that you've just gotta read.

The Vader Sessions

2006-07-22T23:18:00.000+01:00

Another you've just gotta watch, this is James Earl Jones's voice from a load of different movies overlaid on his scenes from Star Wars, Fookin Brill

YouTube - Vader Sessions

For my sins part II

2006-06-30T15:50:00.000+01:00

Apparently.....

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid-term exam.

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the
pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Here is the "Bonus Question" on the chemistry exam:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which
they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state
that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in
Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over.
So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa (a girlfriend of mine
during my Freshman year) that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep
with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night,
then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a
divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my
God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."

For my sins.

2006-06-21T23:06:00.000+01:00

I love computers.

My job depends on using computers.

I use them maybe 6 or seven hours on most days, and when i'm finished working, I sometimes blow the living shite out of electronic monsters for hours on end (Technical term is turn em into "gibs", short for giblets). I rip computers apart and put em back together for the fun of it, I add bits, I remove bits, I tweak em, I download beta software, test it, and chuck it away on a regular basis. There are hundreds of Icons on my desktop background that I'm afraid to delete or uninstall coz they might be useful someday, I am the nerd who hasn't seen the side panel on his computer in two or three years (the week after I bought it I remember putting it away safe for a day while adding in some card or other). I don't work in the computer industry but am what you might call a gifted amateur I suppose. I'm the guy that gets the phone calls in the middle of the night to tell my mates that they have to click this, press that and jiggle the other. This causes my wife to despair at having a conversation without being interrupted with talk of "Re-install that shite" or similar utterances.

Now,

I've just had one of those happenings that we all are warned about, tech guys on the other end of phone lines make their millions from, You know better, you know it'll never happen to you, you haven't bothered to make the weekly backup of your files in two or three months. Yes, you've guessed it, a complete motherboard fucking meltdown.

We manage to get two weeks of sunshine together, in a row even, on this waterlogged Island that we call home, and us Irish whinge about it. I had just got used to seeing my arms turn back to a somewhat golden colour up to the sleeves anyway (Farmers Tan), numerous external garden works were undertaken and then to crown off the fortnight, the shaggin lump of silicon and steel and wire in the corner decides to pack up and fuck off to the silicon equivalent of Majorca and somehow find a job in a plastic paddy pub called "O' Breens" or "Mcmurrihy's" and then stayed there, yes, stayed fucked, even when the rain (Winter even) returned.

The general upshot of this is that I have had to spend most of the last 6 days and nights attempting to get the damn thing to work, succeeding, it locking up again, succeeding again, ad infinitum (wel ad about 4 days) finally giving up the ghost, forking out a ridiculous wad of cash for a new machine (Cheapo ones wouldn't do me natch, I have to keep up with the modern stuff like), finally managing to install all the work software and files on the new machine and then what happens???

The fucking thing coughs, farts, gives a grunt, I swear I hear "HEEEERES JOHNNY" and it starts to work again.

To date I have refrained from clocking the damn thing with a sledgehammer or threatening it with my favourite "DOOM" weapon, the chainsaw, but I don't know if I can hang on much longer..........

Just for the fun of it , Swiped from various blogs and bebos.........

2006-06-14T00:06:00.000+01:00

The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan
borrowed two bucks from Denis Leamy and forgot to pay him back

You are what you eat. That is why Paul O'Connells diet consists entirely
of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children

The eternal conundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an
immovable object" was finally solved when David Wallace punched himself
in the face

Denis Leamy sold his soul to the devil for his ability to never feel pain
and unparalleled strength. Shortly after the transaction was finalised,
Leamy bounced the devil before dumping him on hiss ass and taking his
soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of
the month.

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... The only thing fear has
to fear is Paul O' Connell

Similar to a Russian Nesting Doll, if you were to break David wallace
open you would find another David Wallace inside, only smaller and angrier.

An Englishman once tried to throw a ball over Denis Leamy's
head......This has gone down as the biggest mistake in rugby history

When the Incredible Hulk gets angry he transforms into Paul O'Connell

Superman owns a pair of David Wallace pyjamas

Denis Leamy once had a near death experience...needless to say death now
refuses to come near him

On Moh's hardness scale, diamond is a 10. Paul O'Connell is an 11.

David Wallace wears a cup not to protect himself, but to protect the
players on the other team

We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't
kill me." Too bad Denis Leamy doesn't believe in magic

The world record for most simultanaeous female orgasms was set when Paul
O' Connell took off his top in Paris

David Wallace is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are
trademarked names for his left and right shoulders

Denis Leamy is Bruce Wayne

Paul O'Connell appeared in the "Mortal Kombat II" video game, but was
removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to run the length
of the screen and bust his opponent earning him a " Flawless Victory". When
asked about this "glitch," O'Connell replied, "That's no glitch."

As a child David Wallace used to hunt alligators in the Shannon. I know
what you are thinking: "There are no alligators in the Shannon". Yeah...Now!

Denis Leamy hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't
believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when someone throws
paper, he says,"I win." If someone is foolish enough to dispute this, he
takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face, then says, "I
thought your paper would protect you."

Human females have two X chromosomes. Males have an X and a Y. Paul
O'Connell has three Ys and a P. He's more man than you'll ever be.

Denis Leamy Paul O' Connel and David Wallace once went to Wembley to see
England v Ireland in a soccer match. They stood in the middle of the
English crowd in their Irish jerseys. This has gone down in history as the only time a whole stadium sang the away teams national anthem and a minute silence was held for the home teams'.

Google Maps

2006-06-08T01:48:00.000+01:00

Google Maps

A totally useless but fun bit of a program, useless for directions outside the states but has aerial photos and mapping software, managed to zoom in on a truck on the Sarsfield bridge in Limerick on my phone :-)

Storms

2006-06-03T22:17:00.000+01:00

You've just gotta see this!!
Fabulous photos of twisters and storms.
Storms
Main Site

Well?

2006-06-01T21:05:00.000+01:00

CRW_7305
Originally uploaded by Mobydickler.

I've been mulling over my feelings about the final for the last fortnight or so and I still can't put into words how I felt after the win without boring everyone to death with all the superlatives that have been used already.
This picture that I took at the stadium describes my feelings better than any bullshit that I can write down.

So, Just two words....

Fucking Brilliant!!!!!!!

Go HERE to see the rest:

Bock the Robber: Mr A

2006-05-31T21:25:00.000+01:00

Bock the Robber: Mr A

Hmmm,

2006-05-16T02:15:00.000+01:00

"one hundred and eleven, ", dammit, "three hundred fifty six", okay that's one of them, "four hundred and four", nope.........

It had started the previous Monday, after returning from Headquarters, we had successfully completed the last "job" but were left with one final piece of wet work to complete before we could call it a day. The logistics for this one were going to be a complete bloody nightmare...

Two solid days trying to organise car hire, flights, hotels, an apartment near the location for the final hit, before the play could unfold before us. The pieces of the puzzle were beginning to fall into place. The crew were geared up after the "Chick" had completed the Equipment buys. The apprentices, Badger and Pip had been told that they would be the last to be allocated their responsibilities and also the location for the final assault.

"thirty eight" oh Jesus that's another one,"two five two", god I wish he'd hurry it up...

Each one of us had had to complete a single piece of the work, I had been given the responsibility for the co-ordination. When we were finished with our individual pieces of the jigsaw, I would put them together and the completed plan would be laid out in front of us like a roadmap.

First stumbling block came within the first few days, We lost Gino, from the normal crew. Family always came first for him (as it does) and when they were in trouble he was the one they looked to bail them out. We acknowledged that, thanked god that we weren't put into the same position and moved on. "The Physio", his replacement, so named because of his knack with his hands, was coming along nicely, we had worked with him on similar jobs before and he hadn't let us down yet, but this one was going to be different, so very different. The last of the crew had been with us on our previous attempts but circling around the periphery, with minor parts to play, this time he was part of the main crew. The scope was huge, we had been there before, in fact this was the third attempt and god knows we didn't know whether we had another left in us if we didn't do it this time.

Five of us are going to leave together, the sixth is meeting us at the airport. All the clandestine meetings, brown envelopes and cash changing hands are finally starting to pay off, all other work had been shoved aside to concentrate on this final job and it was down to this final installment to be completed a mere three days before we had to leave if we were to make the window of opportunity.

"Finally, sixty five",
YEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!!

We had done it, The sixth and final ticket had come out in the draw and we were on the road to Cardiff, they say that to the brave and faithful, nothing is impossible....

GWAN MUNSTER!!!!!